I know this may seem strange but I actually think intimacy and a good love making session with my husband makes me want to be a better person and makes me feel like a more complete and whole woman. I have been married to the love of my life for just over 14 years and I think I just realized something I've never thought of. I actually want to get up in the morning and be a more loving, inwardly beautiful person. I want to look and act attractive and feminine. I want to be thoughtful and sweet....and it may all be due to the passion in my relationship with my husband. I'm not talking about one of those "quick the baby's waking up" love sessions (of course those will happen too).... But I'm talking about when you have some actual time to spend with each other. When your heart feels so full of love and passion for one another and when the true meaning of feeling "at one" in your marriage is at it's height. You are overwhelmed with desire for your spouse and that is exactly how marriage should feel. Not lust, but true chemistry and deep love and affection. I've heard people say things to newly weds like " Oh honey, enjoy the honey moon phase"! That insinuates that this passion and excitement you feel for one another will end and what I think is, DON'T LET IT EVER END! AND don't ever let anyone make you feel like it's weird or wrong or not normal because maybe it should be the "Normal". Maybe sex has been made to be something unexciting and uncommon in marriage, especially after the babies come along! Maybe that's why the younger generation is so afraid to "put a ring on it". They are afraid that life will become dull and unexciting! I know it's hard, BELIEVE ME! At the end of the day it's not something that's at the top of the list. After four kids and running around getting them where they need to go, housework, homework, cooking, shopping, changing poopy diapers, and laundry, I seem to be the last thing I want to spend any time on and getting the kids all to bed and trying to get the romance on, is not usually what follows an exhausting day. But in our marriage we try to make it top priority. When my martial relationship is strong and I feel loved and taken care of both emotionally and physically and looked at as though I'm sexy, I somehow feel driven to look and act even more attractive in all aspects of my life as a woman and mommy. I never want to loose that spark that I love so much! I know not all relationships are like this, and don't get me wrong, we have had our ups and downs and roller coaster rides and heartache, but I have to say that one of the things that had always brought us back together on common ground is a longing to be at one with each other again! My husband has truly been amazing to me! Through pregnancy, weight gain, weight loss, raging hormones, he has always said how attracted he is to me. He has always said how much he wants to get me all to himself and when there are issues we need to deal with, we talk about them and honestly there are many times we aren't really sure what the best way is to move forward. Even in the midst of a storm, extreme issues, and bipolar differences we have CHOSEN to make our marriage work! All I can do is trust and pray that our desire never fails us. I have always thought that any marriage can work and be successful if BOTH people have the common belief that you are in for the long haul and that your ultimate goal is to make your spouse truly happy. There are so many variables in marriage and I know it takes two people to build a strong lasting relationship. One of the keys is to keep a soft heart toward your spouse and be willing to stop talking with your mouth and fall in love over and over again both in and out of the bedroom. So I challenge each of us, as mommies and wives to make some time. Get out of those yoga pants and make special time to love on your hubby. We owe it to our children and to our selves to have a happy, healthy, passionate, long lasting love affair!
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